Dear Insurance Company…

Dear Insurance Company.

All I’m asking for is a real pain management program and treatment.

I’m not asking to be a druggie. I’m not asking for much.

I have tried all those medications for depression that you think will help the pain.

I have tried every supplement that doctors, health coaches, other patients, supplement companies and random people have recommended.

I have tried so many varying diets that are supposed to help pain, migraines and inflammation.

I have tried every over the counter medication that might possibly work….. multiple times. So many times that ibuprofen under 800mg and any acetaminophen don’t work at all, that even Aleve and aspirin now cause GI upset.

I do stretching and yoga.

I do meditation.

I do Acupuncture and Physical Therapy.

I push my body beyond what is practical and beneficial simply so I can lead as normal of a life as possible.

I ask you to tell your children they can’t turn on lights or open the blinds in the house because you have a migraine….again.

Tell your children they can’t go outside because you can’t have the windows open to listen to them or sit out with them because it’s too cold and too bright.

Tell your children you can’t walk 5 blocks to the park because your back hurts too much.

Tell your children you can’t tickle them because it hurts you too much.

Tell your children they can’t talk or make noise because of your migraine.

Tell your 7 yr old child to watch his 1 year old little brother because if you stand up you’ll throw up from pain.

Tell your children they can’t hug you or sit on your lap for story time because it hurts too much.

Tell your children you can’t take them to indoor play places because the noise and fluorescent lighting triggers migraines (if you don’t already have one).

Tell your children they can’t invite friends over because their friends are too noisy because they weren’t raised with a migraine parent.

Do your children under 7 years old know how to completely load and unload the dishwasher, do laundry start to finish or make themselves breakfast and lunch because standing causes your feet to lose feeling and makes you lightheaded from the pain?

On your good day, try not to feel like a terrible parent when your child get exuberantly happy because you are making “real breakfast!”

Stop treating me like I’m a drug seeker. My pain won’t ever go away. Never. It’s called permanent chronic pain because it’s always there. Always. I don’t want to be so medicated I can’t enjoy my children’s moments and childhood. I just need the pain managed to I can be their mom. So I can be the wife who is a partner to my husband. So I can help take care of my failing grandmother instead of her taking care of me because I’m worse off. So I can be me. I’m not asking to climb mountains. To run marathons. Just manage day to day pain without saying no to almost everything. Without crying myself to sleep because my body hurts… if I can sleep.Thanks,



5 thoughts on “Dear Insurance Company…

  1. Sending support your way ❤ it hurt my heart to hear how difficult it’s been and the insurance company giving you a hard time. Pain treatment is really in a crisis now, especially chronic pain treatment. It’s not fair to make you suffer. I have been reading recently about cannabis patches for fibromyalgia. It’s not legal where I live, but I’m so curious whether something like that would help me with my fibro pain. Since having my ovaries out, my migraines have much improved. Still get them, but not as often. It’s hard to describe the misery of a migraine. It’s not a headache, like people think. It’s so much more. I’m so sorry you’re hurting so, and hope something good comes along.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much. I’m still looking for cannabis patches that are sold recreationally since it is legal here and my pain specialist has okayed the use of them. The Botox for the migraines didnt work, it seems to have spaced the migraines out a few days but they’re worse when I get them. Not sure I want to try another round.
      You should look into pain creams with CBD oil in them. I’ve found some fibro relief from that lately and when I can think straight will be writing a post about it. It’s a bit spendy but helps.


      • Isn’t botox for migraines really expensive too? I looked into it at one point and it sounded like the effects also wear off pretty quickly so you just have to keep getting treatments. I figured, for me, it wasn’t worth the cost. I’d rather try the cannabis products. Someday! Maybe I need to move!

        Liked by 1 person

      • My insurance pays for the Botox thankfully. It’s supposed to last 3 months. And people who have it work only get like one or two migraines a year instead of daily. And after a few years of Botox they get weaned off and then only go in occasionally.


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